Please share your name

Kai Isaac Proschan

Can you tell us where you are from?

This question is always an interesting one for me. Geographically, I was born in Japan, which I consider my mother country. I spent most of my life growing up in the Bay Area and then spent most of my formative queer years in New York.

What does your morning routine look like?

My morning routine is still a work in progress. I'd love to be able to say that I wake up, meditate, journal, exercise, and spend hours practicing my craft, but realistically I'll do one of those things. One routine that is an always is my makeup ritual. Beating my face is time that's reserved just for me, and I'm doing this for me, not for anyone else. Beauty is my religion and I pray to the makeup gods and goddesses every day.

How would you describe what you do? Your practice, your craft, your cash machine?

I consider myself an artist in many ways. My body is my biggest art project and is both my medium and my canvas. As a trans femme who exists beyond gender binaries, I pay attention to how I create my own self through physical, emotional, and spiritual means. I'm also a writer and storyteller and have a magazine called The Girls Book. It's a storytelling platform for the femmes and by the femmes. We deserve something of our own that showcases the nuances of our community. My cash machine is my full-time day job in marketing. It's not my passion but it pays the bills nicely.

Where do you look for inspiration? A place, a person, a book, an action?

I look towards my community for inspiration. I wouldn't be here now without the work of everyone that came before me and it's important to recognize what's been done so that we can keep building on our legacy. I'm also inspired by books I read (To My Trans Sisters, Detransition, Baby, On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous). I love fashion and style and am always looking at how other people are expressing themselves. If you don't have a point of view in your style, what are you doing? Lastly, growing up as a dancer and runner, movement is a medium that I can use to get in touch with the deeper parts of my soul for that inner wisdom.

What work are you most proud of?

The work I'm most proud of is myself. It's taken years of struggling with my own identity and working on myself through (hours and hours of) therapy to get to this point now. To be completely candid, I didn't think I'd make it to 30 years old. Funnily enough, that was the age that I started my new life as a trans femme. I'm proud of myself for getting to this point and never quitting. I've given up a lot, but I never quit life.

“If you don’t have a point of view in your style, what are you doing?”

What has been the biggest challenge on your journey?

The biggest challenge has been with myself. Growing up with gender dysphoria and as a femme boy (pre-transitioning), loving myself was one of the hardest things to do. I did everything to attain self-love, whether it was gratitude journals, writing inspirational quotes on post-its, or repeatedly telling myself that I was capable and strong. Transitioning saved my life in many ways. Although I wish I had started sooner, I know that my journey up to this point prepared me to be here. Hell, I did the work pre-transitioning and now I'm a fucking princess!

How do you define success? What are the goalposts you look out for?

Success to me is about respect and giving back. Sure, fame and money are great ways to create impact at a larger scale, but more than those things, I want to be respected for my craft. I want to be respected by other artists who created culture and went against the mainstream. I want to give back to my community so anyone out there who's struggling can find solace in others that have gone through similar experiences. With that said, I'd love for my project to become a global success. I'm an international girl, after all.

What's the best advice you've gotten from someone?

Take your time. We're all on different paths and having patience with our own journeys is the key to maintaining sanity. All good things take time. And I hate being rushed.

Who is someone that has helped you get to where you are now? How were they impactful?

It's truly taken a village to get me to where I am now. The people that matter know who they are.